Hello Dear Readers:

My goal is assisting the men of today to become the happiest, most personally successful men they can be. The last blog introduced the subject of the superhighway and the added stress it brings. One of its profound effects is the intense focus on persona, the external ways one presents oneself to the world. Along with it we judge ourselves by a sense of what others believe is in style, good, attractive, right, fair, or just.

Human beings live in a social context, want to treat others decently, and get along with one another.  However, how we do this can vary widely among cultures, communities, and individuals.  One way in which I have seen many men in effect lose their way is because there is such  intense societal pressure to “be a man,” that a significant proportion of men focus almost exclusively on others’ definition of what it means to be a man in today’s world.

Many men lose their sense of self is identifying themselves by their work, earnings, portfolio, and possessions.  In particular, over-identification with one’s career to the point that men pour the vast majority of their time, effort, and resources in climbing the corporate ladder often contributes to a personal and profound sense of emptiness. For the man who sees himself solely as the job he performs, this self measurement can result in a crisis if he falls short of his expectations. Money alone should not be the measure of a man’s worth.  Moreover, there is an old saying that “you can’t take it with you when you go.”

At this crossroad, many men find that they have fresh challenges about what kind of life they will live after work. Some of the questions a man may ask himself include: Who am I, aside from being a _____________? Now that I am not actively earning money, how do I see myself?  What are my strengths and weaknesses? What are my values, interests, goals? How do I spend my days in retirement?  And finally, how can I feel good about myself when for my entire adult life, my self-esteem has come overwhelmingly from the work world?

These men have, so to speak, have put all their eggs into their work basket and now that that basket no longer exists, it is incumbent upon each individual to redefine for himself what kind of man he wants to be.

That is why one of the goals of my work coaching the contemporary man is to help him explore and answer these questions for himself.  It is exciting, challenging, and highly rewarding for me to see men make a breakthrough and shed their old skin of who they thought they were, and discover their true essence of who they really are!

My raison d’etre is to be of service to others, particularly other men. I can be reached from anywhere at samueljroland@gmail.com.  I look forward to accompanying you on your personal journey of self-discovery. Until next time… be well.  I wish you much peace and many blessings,

Samuel